The next ten years...

 I turned 30 today. It also happened to be mothers day. I ate tons of food and spent time with people I loved. I got to hear my 4 year old get up in church and say why he loves me...my heart melted. I got to sit and relax. I got to play with my energetic beautiful almost 2 year old. And...my favorite gift of the day...I got to hold my big 4 year old boy while he slept on my chest. I havent got to do that with him in so long. I realized today sitting with my family how blessed I am. I have a mother who is and always has been my role model in my life, especially when it comes to getting through hard times. I have my own sweet little family...and I have a wonderful husband.

Turning 30 is a big year...its supposed to be a leap out of the fun youthful years of your 20s into full fleged adulthood. But honestly...I feel exactly the same as I did yesterday and the day before. But when I really reflect back on the last 10 years I know I am very different person at 30 then I was at 20.  One...I have a lot more wrinkles on my forehead then I did back then, and according to the nice lady that cuts my hair Ive started going grey. Ive also had two kids and after that your body just doesnt go back to what it was at 20.  Im a lot more tired now than I was 10 years ago. And I have about a million times more responsibility in my life than I did back in the day.  

But...my life is also much more full and blessed. Im happy at 30 and I dont know that I could say that when I was 20.  My 20's were full of many very high highs and some extremely low lows.  Both of my sweet beautiful children were born in my 20s. They are my lifes greatest blessings.  I finished my nursing degree in my 20s. Through that I am able to have a career I love and do something that I feel lets me touch peoples lives in ways I otherwise would not get to do.  I got married...twice...in my twenties. Both marriages in their moment were good memories...the divorce that happened in between...not so much.  I was able to meet my lifes great love at the end of my 20s. He helped carry me through the hardest trial I have met in my life to date.  I look back at the last 10 years with no regrets. Yes there were hard times, but the hard times made me love and appreciate all of the good ones.

Life is not meant to be easy. Its a rough and bumpy ride meant to refine us into the people that we are meant to be. My life right now at the beginning of my 30s isnt perfect, but its exactly how I would like it to be.  I have two amazing kids that drive me crazy but that I love so much my heart aches.  I am blessed to be able to have a third little miracle in the next few months. I have a husband that I know loves me and I love him.  I live by family that I am so blessed to have and I am so thankful that my children have so many people near them that love them. I have a lot more living to do and a lot more growing but Im happy. And that's the main lesson I think I learned from my 20s. I learned how to be happy and more importantly that I deserve to be happy. 

As I start the next decade of my life I look forward to the challenges and all the highs and lows that follow. These are the good years when my babies are young....ten more years and Jack will be 14...YIKES. I hope that I can relax and enjoy life the next ten years and earn a few more of those pesky wrinkles and grey hairs. President Gorden B. Hinkley, a past prophet from my church, said "In all living have much fun and laughter. Life is meant to be enjoyed not just endured." I want this to be my motto the next ten years. I want to enjoy my life and have fun while doing it.  No regrets.